You groped for my clitoris but you couldn’t find the spot.
The rest of it was like when you’ve got a stain of ink
on your arm you’re trying to rub off. It was doing nothing for me.
You were just in the wrong place, too high up.
There’s no point in rubbing anyone’s pubic mound.
It’s not where the good stuff is!
Make Me Ooh (Explicit) from Bitch on Vimeo.
A Woman Passes Judgment
It’s hard to control my anger after what happened last night. I need to get this off my chest before I explode. I’m not sure what response I expect, but I think it’s important to be honest and truthful because I have some issues with how the latter part of the night played out.
Women’s bodies are complex; they need to be listened to. In general, I have to tell you this, even though it’s hard to say and hear: your overall style is just much too aggressive and forceful. Some of it was fun to be on the end of, some of it really wasn’t.
Women lie about what they like in bed because we are raised from birth to take treatment and receive behaviours and not tell the truth about what we want/like. And there were some behaviour you indulged in that felt very ‘porny’ – I would have expected that from a younger man, but you, frankly, are old enough to know better.
It was not too far away from that scene in American Psycho where he’s fucking the girl and flexing his muscles in the mirror! It was like you’d seen things in porn and were acting them out. There was just the most basic errors being made – you weren’t responsively listening to what I liked.
When you start touching a breast, and it causes a little noise of pleasure, you carry on doing just that – you don’t speed up or go rough. My tit is not a piece of dough you are trying to knead. My nipple is not the button on a radio, where you’re trying to find the right station.
A tit should not be pulled. It was all just far too brash and aggressive and simply unenjoyable – it made me worry that if we did have sex, you’d hurt me, not because of penis size, but because you would just be banging away, I fear, and it would be painful and, frankly, self-centred.
I’m not saying sex all has to be very soft and gentle, but you have to read signals, and you weren’t doing that. Fingering is another problem. At the beginning, you were finding a decent spot just between the lips and you should have been able to read that I was getting somewhere.
But then you went off, you couldn’t find the spot, and the rest of it was like when you’ve got a stain of ink on your arm you’re trying to rub off. It was doing nothing for me. You were just in the wrong place, too high up. There is no point in rubbing anyone’s pubic mound. It’s not where the good stuff is! Again, you are old enough to know better.
Now imagine if you did find the right spot, you did get to the clit and you made me come. Now imagine if I then pulled my pants up and said, “That was great! I gotta get the train, this was fun.” You’d be shocked if I left you with blue balls. And you’d be 100% right to be a little pissed.
So after you’d come (which was fine, I have no problem with that, not at all, my clothes are in the wash, lol), you just pulled your pants up and started to leave! Like the night was over because you came! Now that was fucking wrong, and I think you know that.
There should be a point of pride in this – making a woman come is not easy, it takes some work, and I tell you, when I got home and wanked, I came in less than a minute. Again, you should know that I wasn’t far off just due to generally being aroused.
I’m not sure our styles are right for fitting together. There’s a general point to be made here, which I hope you can take on: not only do women lie about what they like/are enjoying, but they don’t speak up in bed when things aren’t right – so I am speaking up.
I’m not trying to be/do anything, but provide useful feedback for future sexual encounters. But I can imagine that every woman you’ve had sex with has felt the same way.
It was all a bit arrogant and narcissistic and over-confident. If you ask a woman what the worst thing a man does in bed, they will likely say, “When he pushes my head on his dick.” That was literally a dick move.
A blow job is a sensitive, vulnerable act. I love giving them. The person doing so is in control and for me, nothing’s more of a mood killer than feeling a hand on my head.
It felt like you were thinking – I’ve seen this in porn, no woman has ever said it’s not cool, I’ll do that. But you need to know – it’s not cool.
I control how far in my throat your dick goes. Pushing it further in felt really over the line. Kudos to you for apologising – I appreciated that, though it shouldn’t have happened in the first place.
Again, you may think, this chick’s crazy, women don’t feel this way. We do. We lie. We are trained from birth to please and defer to men, to be demure and let people do things to us.
