Adolescence can be a difficult time for young men. In addition
to all the awkward physical changes that occur, teen boys must
also deal with a number of mental and emotional changes as
they transition into adulthood, the most troubling of which for
many teens is a new or heightened degree of sexual awareness.
Earlier this month, one 15-year-old Japanese middle school
student, plagued by a sex drive so strong that it got in
the way of his studies, decided to seek help by writing
to the sex advice column of a popular Japanese newspaper.
His plea was answered by 64-year-old sociologist and prominent
Japanese feminist Chizuko Ueno:I want you to try asking an
experienced mature woman to let you have sex with her, even if
it means getting down on your hands and knees and begging.
Even if you are turned down, don’t give up. My friend who does
this tells me he was told OK one out of ten times he asked.
No two women will experience the same degree
of libido, sexual arousal or lust. But anecdotal
evidence reinforces the idea that the cougar
phenomenon is based on something real,
something creatively and vibrantly sexual.
One theory is that the primitive evolutionary part
of ourselves realizes that time is running out, we
are edging ever closer to menopause and a lack of fertility.
Therefore, as a matter of biological “hurry
before it’s too late” women undergo an
extreme openness to and desire for sex.
Fuck the Cougar
Apparently, women in their thirties and forties
are more sexually desirous, fantasize more and
have richer fantasies than younger women.
Of course another theory hinges on the fact
that for a lot of women sexual desire is
linked to confidence and experience.
Women with more sexual experience and more
self-confidence (often, but not always,
older women) are bound to feel freer and
more experimental in the bedroom.
An older woman ‘looking after’
a younger man is called cubbing.
“After most of my friends got divorced,
they dabbled with a younger man. One of
them called it her “jailbreak phase.”
It’s part of the freedom you experience when
you’re newly single. You suddenly want to go
out to clubs and go dancing—to relive all
those youthful feelings again.
Being with someone young brings back
the kind of excitement and romance
you knew as a teenager, before all
the terrible things that can happen
in relationships happened to you.”
Cougars Know How
When you do start dating again after a certain
age, you quickly discover that it’s mostly
younger guys who are interested in you.
Turns out a lot of 50-something men don’t
find women their age attractive. In their
mind, a woman over 50 is like their mother.
But for younger guys, who grew up with the MILF,
older women seem exotic. It’s a turn-on.
They want to learn something. They want access
to a wider world. They’re looking for an adventure,
and so are the women. The interesting thing about
cubbing is that it’s almost always the young guy
pursuing the older woman, not the other way around.