My boyfriend and I have been together for a while now.
There’s a problem. I can never reach orgasm through
vaginal penetration. The closest I get is by fingering.
I’m guessing you don’t know if you’ve ever had an orgasm.
If that’s the case, I think masturbating alone using
clitoral stimulation is the best place to start.
When you’re alone, you’re able to focus more
on what feels good and what you want without
any pressure, which is the best environment
in which to reach orgasm.
Masturbation is one of the most amazing ways
to get to know your body and if you know how
to make yourself cum, it’s a lot easier to
get there with a partner.
If your goal is to have orgasms during penetration,
there are a few things to consider. Many women
find they can only consistently have orgasms from
clitoral stimulation, either alone or with penetration.
Many women who have penetrative orgasms also mainly
get them from certain positions that offer stronger
clitoral and/or G-spot stimulation.
If you’re on top and leaning forward, or if you’re
in missionary and your partner pushes his pelvis down,
making his pubic bone hit your clitoris.
Some women who can orgasm just from penetration find it
easier if they start with a clitoral orgasm during foreplay.
Having an orgasm relaxes your body and can make you more
sensitive to touch. There’s also less pressure to
orgasm since you already have.
Relax, forget all expectations and get to know what
really gets you off. Even if you try everything and
can’t orgasm from penetration alone, you’ll probably
discover something you like even better.
Girls Get off on Porn
Women have been culturally conditioned to think
watching porn is inherently wrong, desperate or weird.
They’ve been warned that porn films are intrinsically degrading,
fake, bigoted and gross. This is probably because most mainstream
porn sites are, but I continue to beg you, baby, please, just give porn a chance!
Go to the naughty store, pick out the naughty film,
you put it in your naughty DVD player and you press
the naughty play button. Hold it! Press pause.
Did you know there’s a wrong way to watch it?
Getting off to porn is like any other sex act. How good it
feels depends on your company, props, technique, mental state,
physical comfort and environment.
If you’ve watched the porn film and found it failed
to rock your sexy socks, maybe it’s because you were
doing it wrong! Here’s how to do it right.
Get comfortable. Just because you’re watching a XXX-er doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be choosy about when, where and how you’re going to get off. I hate watching porn with other people. I just prefer to roll the X-rated video solo.
I like to get in bed, clothes still on (but no socks, never socks), in the middle of the day. I only watch porn on my laptop and with headphones in, volume cranked to a ridiculous, moaning blare.
My adorable dog must be absolutely nowhere in sight. You get the idea. I know how I like it, and that’s the way I’ll do it. And so should you.
Ready the troops. Before you hit play, make sure you’ve got lube, toys and other scandalous accoutrement close, clean and charged.
You may think a porn flick only requires a couple of spitty digits, but it’s amazing what a little extra slide and batteries can do for your porn.
Keep your finger on the trigger. Well, yes, that one but also the fast-forward button. It’s rare that an entire two-hour porn will do it for you.
Check previews before committing to one and don’t worry about watching chronologically… you won’t lose the storyline. Most porn offer a variety of couplings and/or sex acts.
Does oral sex tickle your fancy? Anal? Doggie style? Skip around, rewind and repeat your favorite parts or change the DVD entirely.
This is about turning you on, so if it doesn’t, turn it off. Same goes for sound effects. Clearly, I’m an aural girl. Some porn features music, others highlight slaps and moans. If you like it, turn it up. If not, turn it off.
Don’t forget foreplay! Give a scene and yourself time to warm up before pulling the plug on the show or yourself. And when you’ve finally hit your stride and had your fill, don’t forget to relax a little afterwards.
A wank is the great way to relax [I’m sure you know]. Let the languor linger. don’t feel guilty about ‘wasting’ time. You needn’t jump up and scrub the floor as atonement for your ‘sin’.
Do women like porn? Is there really “porn for women?”
Do women read sex blogs, cruise porn sites and watch sexually explicit videos for their own pleasure?
Are our fantasies just as much about fucking, as they are supposed to be about shopping? Are we tired of lame, insulting, stereotypical porn?
Women enjoy porn and erotica of all kinds, and it’s a fact – don’t listen to sensationalists who would like to convince you otherwise.
Girls Want Better Sex
When it comes to sexuality, girls today are
receiving mixed messages. Girls hear that
“they’re supposed to be sexy, they’re
supposed to perform sexually for boys but
their sexual pleasure is unspoken.”
Pop culture and porn sexualize young women by
creating undue pressure to look and act sexy.
These pressures affect both the sexual
expectations girls put on themselves and the
expectations boys project onto them.
Girls are often navigating between being considered
slutty or a prude. Their own desires are often lost
in the shuffle. Girls are being taught to please
their partners without regard to their own desires.