Sexuality seems to scares the hell out of a lot of people. Maybe that’s half the problem — the fire, brimstone and huge helping of guilt that accompanies sex.
I found it fascinating last week when a post on the social utility Facebook caused such a stir and so many varied opinions.
The story was about a protest and was accompanied by a photo of a young woman, naked from the waist up, putting her hand in the air, and scrawled across her nakedness were the words: “Still not asking for it.”
The message, at least the way I read it, is that no matter how provocatively a woman dresses, even if she’s half-naked with her breasts exposed, no one can touch her without her permission.
Literally thousands of comments ensued, with a myriad of messages. One stuck out for me, though, and made my blood boil. A man compared this display to waving meat in front of a shark.
Are you kidding me? Are we still that archaic that we can compare a man put in front of a naked woman to an uncontrollable, vicious, hungry animal? Seriously?
I often wonder where those kinds of statements are rooted. Could it be his dad taught him that women were there to be “taken”?
Did his minister or priest present sex and a naked woman as the “ultimate temptation” to be avoided at all costs, in the event he could not control his urges?
After I mulled it a bit, I thought, well yeah, I guess I was brought up that way, too. In the Catholic school system of the 1980s, you’d be sent home if your skirt was too short or your top too low.
Does that still happen? My friends who are parents want to keep their daughters “innocent” for as long as possible. Does that mean keeping them in the dark about sexuality?
And what about the boys? Does anyone explain to them that their nocturnal emissions in the wee hours are nothing to be ashamed of, a completely natural part of growing up?
How about when a male youngster is making a presentation or standing to ask a question and has an embarrassing rise to the trousers? Typically nothing is discussed, just nervous giggles and whispers.
We’ve sure messed up ourselves and our children. How are we supposed to feel about sex? Are we even supposed to like it?
Men are apparently expected to love it, whenever and whatever. Women, on the other hand, are trained to resist it. The repercussions for both are immense, including public shunning.
Men who aren’t “doing it” are often labelled homosexual. Women who “give it away” are called loose, among lots of worse things.
Women often feel guilty about sex, as if it’s wrong to get pleasure. Isn’t this a lovely legacy to leave our children? It makes me cringe that some people still think this way.
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