These days we watch films and read books
where women are always up for sex.
What about the women who can’t relax enough
to have an orgasm, or when they’ve got a
messy period, or when they’re exhausted with
juggling marriage, children and a demanding job?
It’s probable the loss of libido is caused
by hidden hostility towards her partner
Often when a woman is blaming her hormones for her
lack of desire, closer inspection of the relationship
reveals all sorts of stresses, strains and anger.
If she’s is fed up because her man is never romantic
to her, or never takes her out, or never thanks her
for a beautifully cooked meal. Or always expects her
to take responsibility for contraception.
It’s hardly surprising that she doesn’t feel like
rewarding him in bed. She loses interest.
The Great Sex Hype
Addressing this kind of problem is much harder than deciding ‘it’s all to do with hormones’. The unpalatable truth is that it’s the relationship that needs changing – and that can’t be done hormonally.
Too many women believe hormonal problems are at
the root of their unsatisfactory love lives.
Therapists find that the woman has gone off sex
because of some flaw in the relationship.
Perhaps the man is too bossy, or overbearing.
Sometimes therapy can put this right especially
if both the man and the woman can accept it’s
The effect of the relationship not a sexual problem.
Occasionally, one or both partners refuse
to face up the fact that there is no magic
pill to cure their problems and that they
need instead to make changes in the relationship.
Perhaps it’s time to face reality. The relationship
just isn’t working out. The sex has become dull,
the whole routine of living together is a constant
irritation. Maybe it’s time to call it a day and split up.